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  • Dr. Lesa Lawson

My Sweet Crush, pt 3 - You Really Got a Hold on Me

I don't like you But I love you Seems that I'm always Thinking of you Oh, oh, oh, You treat me badly I love you madly You've really got a hold on me

~ She and Him

The moment I dreaded - having to decide in truth whether our relationship was going places. Other than the doctor's, I wasn't really going anywhere and then, too, a hint of annoyance was creeping in because I was the only one suffering. Sugar was just fine. Yep, my sweet thing kept doing the sweet duty. As I lay in bed, one morning, squinting at the ceiling through the small slits that my headache allowed, I realized that Sugar didn't look half as attractive as I had first thought. I was sick of the saccharine platitudes that I allowed to propel me in a pendulum of peaks and valleys. That, they say, is the beginning of the end, when the rose tint wears off the glasses or, in my case, when the sugar no longer hits the lips.

Having heard little rumblings from different people about proper eating and healthy sugars, I endeavored to try something new. I was willing to try almost anything at this point, including standing on my head, were it not aching so awfully.

It took eighteen months of false starts, break-ups, make-ups and re-pledges before I could see Sugar without experiencing a pang. In two words, Sugar "got old." I was tired of feeling and looking less than my best, of headaches and yellow tongue. What was I doing, really - auditioning for a role as a sick patient?

After abstaining and 'ritualizing' for a while, I realized, one day, that Sugar no longer had a hold on me. She and Him, you're on your own. I leave you to your song and your fate.

To be continued...

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